You Too

It’s heartbreakingly beautiful to me-
Someone declaring their presence,
Their place.
Standing amongst mountains,
And forests,
And saying me too.
When I see a bird –
Inconspicuous and small,
Singing out into the plethora of sounds-
Playing upon the air,
And I stop long enough to hear,
My heart sings with him-
Yes,
You too.

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This Wild Now

This lovely moment-
This wild now,
Potential glistening in the air.
Here, here I can breathe in, call forth-
The brightest sides of me,
And offer the darkness-
A place to rest in her arms.
If I just hold myself here.
This place breaking open time-
To shed itself of past, of projection.
You are never too far gone-
Not in this lovely moment,
Not in this wild now!

Mourning

My body doesn’t know what it feels like-
To howl and scream out,
From the depths of my belly,
To live walking bare foot on natural ground,
And swimming in cold rivers,
Which I kneel daily to drink from.

I do not let my breasts fall-
And my body be.

Instead I fail each day,
At being sexy enough.
I strive each day for success,
I eat food which I did not watch grow,
I drink water from taps and bottles,
I talk about progress,
And I carve out half an hour-
For silence.

I think my body-
Is in mourning.

War Field & War Field Part Two – A Recording

Like many people, I experience depression and severe anxiety. In June 2013 I attempted suicide for the second time in my life, It landed me in a coma and on life support. I wrote a poem after recovering from the attempt called “War Field” and now 4.5 years later I have written a follow up poem, “War Field Pt 2”. The first poem was about coming back into my life after the attempt and the second is about the life I have now built.

The Witnessing

Before you rise,
Softly beckoning us-
To join the day,
Do you hold the same joy I do-
As I wait for you in the dark?

Do you watch with anticipation,
Sensing the potential-
Quivering in our chests?

Do you imagine the new and wild beauty,
Your gaze will uncover-
As you breathe light upon this place?

I always feel so privaledged to witness you,
And sometimes I am bold enough to think,
You may find pleasure,
In what you are witnessing too.